TEAMspinella: 2012

Friday, December 21, 2012

[TEAMspinella] Christmas in America

Being back in the US after spending so many Christmases in Taiwan, we enjoy the focus on sharing the redeemer's love with the world. We also notice the longings for personal blessing and good favor. The shared love comes out in things like a holiday banquet for internationals, a musical portraying love entering our world as a homeless man with a shopping cart, and family and community gatherings including cards, gifts, and songs about love, joy, and incarnation. The longings show up in the authenticity of shared painful memories and crushed expectations, the frenetic shopping and commercial pressure, and even the demands that government be fair, wise, and stable for us and our people. (Fiscal cliff, anyone?)

We are grateful that we are able to gather with family this Christmas (including our young adult children), even as we also remember those we won't see, in places like Spain, Turkey, Taiwan, and Timbuktu (okay, Ohio, Oregon, Florida, California, Arizona, New York, New Hampshire, places like that!) We are grateful that we can continue in our ministry with TEAM, traveling to places where Christmas is more often known as a distant curiosity than an incarnational revelation. We are grateful that we can enjoy living in Colorado Springs, around the block from Laura's parents in our own home, looking at the mountains* and enjoying the space, the sky, and the American lifestyle.

We also see the letters and emails from many in ministry, reminding us that this is a time of generous giving for many, and also a time of great need and great opportunity. Our own situation is mixed. We welcome some new ministry partners this year, but since our return from Taiwan we have also lost some faithful partners who journeyed with us in ministry many years. One special goodbye is to Fellowship Alliance Chapel after 21 years. They were the first to send us out. FAC, we miss you already!

Each one of you who partner with us in this ministry is a special gift from God, no matter what part you play or for what period of time. Your partnership is not something we earn—you are like wise men who see something and act on it. We want to do the same! May we all enjoy giving in the redeemer's name while we still have opportunity! As we do ministry, we are very aware we have this opportunity on behalf of many. May you enjoy giving generously wherever God directs you. If you want to partner in our ministry, check out this new link on TEAM.org: partner with the Spinellas through TEAM.org

May you be comforted with a comfort beyond humanity. May you celebrate in the joy of incarnation. May your longings be as nothing in the face of your joy and your redemption. Merry Christmas!

With love, Steve and Laura

PS *A note about the mountains: In Colorado Springs, there is dry (almost desert) mountain air with a mountain 7000 feet (2000m) higher just 20 miles (30km) away, so many homes have some angle that gives a view of Pike's Peak or at least the front range of mountains. In our case, this view is over the roof of the house behind us from the window of the guest bedrooms, so come see for yourself! It's closer than Taiwan (well, for most of you!)

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>

--
--
This is an email list for friends of Steve and Laura...
To reply to a posting, send email to steve.spinella@gmail.com
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to TEAMspinella-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
To see past emails, pictures, et al, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/TEAMspinella?hl=en

Thursday, November 15, 2012

[TEAMspinella] Staying close(r) to home

Right now our passports are in the hands of another country's government, actually the sixth largest by population if you either know it or want to look it up. We're hoping they will allow us to visit in January--but we haven't bought tickets yet. As US citizens who travel, we can get used to being treated special because of that. When special means nice, we seldom object. The first time we visited Thailand I misunderstood the signs and got in the wrong line. After taking pictures and filling out visa application forms, I was waiting in a line to talk to an official when it gradually began to dawn on me that there were no other US citizens in the line. Some of you already know why--US citizens don't need visas for Thailand. Since then, I reflect on that scene when I think about what it means for our world. You see, I had nothing to do with where I was born nor did they. We all are equally people, yet they had to work harder and wait longer just to enter a whole country while I could walk right up to immigration and hand them an empty passport.

So this fall we've stayed put--relatively. I have made three trips, with one more planned for this week, and they've all been in the US. We've been to Oregon and Washington, Illinois, Texas and Florida, and (now, Lord willing) Indiana. (Laura is exercising her discretion and staying home from Illinois and Indiana.) You may remember me saying that we want to maximize face time with those we are serving--first going to where they are, second inviting them to come to us, third meeting them where they gather, and then connecting virtually. Oregon and Florida may seem pretty far away from Colorado, but compared to the countries where those people sometimes live, those places are really close and really easy to get to! Indiana is one of those places where people are gathering. I am going for a conference for people passionate about the intersection between wellbeing and international ministry. I first went to the conference in 1988, when Sarah was nine months old, joining about sixty others. This year there will be about 300.

When I write you I try to make it interesting, and part of our adjustment to being based in the US now instead of Taiwan is that things just don't seem quite as exciting to talk about. I could tell you someone else's stories--we continue to enjoy hearing fascinating stories and sharing in the journeys of the people we are loving on in the Father's name, but I learned some hard lessons in Taiwan about telling other people's stories. Even if I feel confident that you can't figure out who I'm talking about or I have explicit permission to tell someone's stories, ultimately those stories have other owners, and these email updates are about our story, whether it is exciting or quite ordinary.

Thank you for reading our stories. Thank you for caring about us. We are still passionate about our ministry and happy to invest our time and energy this way. It is because the Father cares for us that we can care for one another, reaching beyond the barriers that might naturally prevent that care, including language, place, citizenship, culture, and so much more. May we have grace to care for those the Father brings to us and the initiative and energy to reach out in love even when, to the world around us, it might seem most unlikely or unusual.

On a family note, my son Rob has been joking that we have no family Thanksgiving traditions. Probably having Turkey for Thanksgiving last year didn't much help. (The country Turkey--we ate chicken but we saw live turkeys nearby, as well as sheep, asparagus fields, ancient ruins, and persimmons.) All the same, we are going to be here for Thanksgiving this year, and will welcome "home" (briefly) Sarah from grad studies in Texas, Joey and his Laura from their new home in Austin, Texas, and two of their cousins whose family is in Taiwan from Minnesota and Illinois. Maybe we can make up for lost time or something!

In him who keeps us, Steve and Laura

PS Regarding the language in these emails, we ask your tolerance. We try to avoid certain words not to mislead, but rather just to be respectful where certain words are taken differently by some people and to avoid attracting off topic attention from search engines. If you are unsure what we mean, please ask. Sometimes what I think is clear is actually not so clear, as some of you have reminded me now and again.

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>

Thursday, September 13, 2012

[TEAMspinella] Fall projects

It's already been six weeks plus since Joey and Laura got married. As I write, they are flying to Taiwan for a visit—Joey's first return since he came with a cast on his leg for Christmas 2009, and his new wife Laura's first time to see where he grew up k-12.

In the meantime, Laura and I have taken on some new assignments. We are now getting acquainted in a deeper way with friends and coworkers in several countries in the part of Asia nearer Europe. (I won't mention the names here, but you've heard them!) Within our non-profit, we're part of the "GloCare" team, responsible for global care for friends and co-workers, and within this team, different ones of us are designated to coordinate with care facilitators in each area to help each international worker we partner with to stay, to flourish, and to contribute. We also partner with other like-minded workers and caregivers in these areas.

Our strategy is to seek maximum face time with the friends and coworkers we want to support—to go to where they are, to invite them to come to us, to meet up with them where they gather, and to connect at a distance. Beyond that, I work on projects to enhance global care and we both invest in mentoring and small groups locally.

One of the projects that has come up just now involves the "A team." TEAM actively works to identify people who are a good fit with our approach to international service roles and coach, advocate, and mentor them toward full readiness for servant ministry in places with the most need. The "A team" is working to make our process friendlier, faster, and more valuable to millennials and beyond who are potential partners with us. Please intercede for me in this, for the "A team" and its role in this, and for progress toward these meaningful goals. The "A" stands for assessment, which stands alongside coaching and placement as the three key challenges for deployment in international service roles.

Yours with love in the one who keeps us,

Steve and Laura

PS Since these countries we referred to above are in the "red zone*," we won't be giving details about our travels and contacts in these updates. Of course, the places we go will still be listed in our passports and we'll have valid reasons for being there when we go! We are also doing some traveling to meet up with people in North America while they're back since the trips are shorter (for us!) and people are (sometimes!) more free to visit here.

Special thanks to those who are helping us fund this travel. We try to do it as frugally as possible, but it is a major expense for us. We would benefit from additional partners, so we invite you to join us in funding this as well.

*red zone=places where ministry is not a good reason in itself to be there, so other valid reasons for being present and caring for people are essential.

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>

Saturday, August 04, 2012

[TEAMspinella] Congratulations! Joey and Laura Spinella: Reception August 25 in Colorado Springs

An invitation to a reception for Joey and Laura! (click on this link to go to evite)

Always some new technology (like these e-vites on the link above), but marriage, now that is a joy and challenge for the ages! Joey and Laura have done it and now we want to celebrate with them in Colorado Springs!

We'll have a come and go reception at our home (1930 Springcrest Rd) from 2-6pm August 25. Please come and help us celebrate if you can, and spread the word to everyone who loves Joey and Robby :-)

You may also be wondering how everyone is doing almost a week after the wedding. I think the parents are all recovering, Joey and Laura are off somewhere celebrating, and the family has again dispersed to the four winds (I think some of them got back to Taiwan just after the latest typhoon!)

In the one who keeps us, and who we're trusting now to keep Joey and Laura as well, Steve and Laura

PS If you can't figure out the evite (or I got it wrong) and you're planning to come, just send us an email or give us a call!

Plain text link to evite for cut and paste: http://new.evite.com/l/PEWWE7H3GZ

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>

Friday, July 20, 2012

[TEAMspinella] Last weeks, last suppers, and lasting love

Today is our 32nd anniversary. Today in the locker room after some family racquetball someone told me, "I've had three marriages in under 20 years, what's your secret?" I told him, "Mainly forgiveness. Grace, mercy, and forgiveness." Robby chimed in, "On Laura's part." That about sums it up! Thank you, Laura!

This is our "last week" together as a family of 5. Sarah is back from her graduate program for two weeks (longest vacation she's had since she started, I think), Robby has moved back here to Colorado, and Joey is getting ready for the wedding. Starting Friday night, our extended family will be arriving. Next week we expect to see all my sisters and most of their families, and also all of Laura's sisters and most of their families. It should be wild. After all, it will mainly be remembered as the "last week" before the wedding. We're thankful our family can gather from far away--one of the consequences of a mobile lifestyle.

Of course, that last supper before the wedding is our responsibility, so Laura has been planning for that, with a little help from all of us. We plan to do it at the church in Boulder and provide food rather than having it catered, so it will take a good bit of coordination and help!

But most of all, we're celebrating lasting love and praying and supporting Joey and his fiancee Laura as they launch what we hope and pray will be the wedding of their lives (July 28).

May God give us all grace and mercy, especially as our journey takes new turns. Thank you for encouraging and supporting us in our journey. (I'm going to make this a "work-free" update.)

Love in the Lord who keeps us, Steve and Laura

PS The Waldo Canyon fire is now 100% contained, though of course the lasting damage from the fire is not. Even though the damage was so extensive (more homes lost (346) than any fire in Colorado perhaps ever), we are also thankful for God's grace in the midst of this disaster as the fire could have gone so much further. Even in the burn zone, there were many homes that were spared.

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>

Thursday, June 28, 2012

[TEAMspinella] Fire in the camp

This is a bit anti-climactic, as by now people all over the US and beyond know that Colorado Springs is facing a very dangerous fire. In a single day it went from having consumed 1 structure to having consumed more than 100, covering 5000 acres to covering much more than 15000. In fact, at the moment over 30,000 people have been evacuated and more are being evacuated today. Our house and Laura's parents (our permanent address) are located just across the freeway (I-25) from the Air Force Academy air field, which is a staging area for the air support for the fire fighting efforts. So far, we have not been asked to evacuate or been told we are in a "pre-evacuation zone." (What a concept, eh?) Everyone living across the freeway from us has been evacuated, however, including our local place of worship, WVC.

Lately I've been thinking a lot about what it means to settle someplace, and particularly here in Colorado Springs. As this wildfire has become so dangerous, it reminds me of other disasters we have faced in community.

In Taiwan, that included the 7.9 quake "921" in 1999, as well as various typhoons. It also included, less directly, the missile launches offshore by the world's biggest country at the time of our arrival in 1996, the year Taiwan first directly elected a president. (It has happened every 4 years since!) Then there was SARS (Sudden Acute Respiratory Syndrome) and to a lesser extent, the bird flu.

Community disasters are marked by the sense that not just one, but everyone, in the community is in danger of death or deep loss. Since we all face danger and disaster in our own way, this both draws us together but also deeply separates us. We stimulate each other's sense of trauma by sharing our stories, displaying our fears, and generally getting wound up in all our various ways. At the same time, we also care for one another, stand alongside (or run alongside) one another, and share in the facing of an overwhelming communal challenge.

When you are an outsider in a community, this is often a time to leave. But when you are settling in the community, this is a time when we may show our solidarity and belonging by staying, with the hope of eventually flourishing again, or even flourishing more than ever before, tested and strengthened by the challenges we have suffered.

So at the moment, we are "okay," only threatened, not destroyed, but very much feeling the challenge and grief of our community as this disaster, the Waldo Canyon Fire, continues to unfold. We remember where we were when the plume of smoke first went up (north Union, headed to La Casita for a birthday meal), and where we were when the dense smoke and fearsome fires erupted on the front slope yesterday, as houses burned one after another (preparing to go to a small group, only to receive there one of our group as they evacuated under emergency conditions and police orders.).

Please remember us as we join in this community, face this challenge, and adjust our expectations as the world around us changes. Meanwhile, we face some other challenges as we seek to come alongside our coworkers in some of the most challenging places in our world, far away from here, but much in the news in recent times. Since these are places that are not part of our personal history, including the sixth largest country in the world, there is much to learn, both as to history and to current realities, as well as the personal journeys of people living there by choice with eternal goals. Please remember us in this as well. Perhaps the things we are facing here will help us in better coming alongside people in these other places.

Yours in the one who keeps us, no matter the challenge or the opportunity, Steve and Laura

PS I think you understand that some places in the world are of great value, but publicizing names is sometimes counterproductive. That's why we make references like the one above that may be a bit puzzling, but are not misleading.

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>

--
This is an email list for friends of Steve and Laura...
To reply to a posting, send email to steve.spinella@gmail.com
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to TEAMspinella-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
To see past emails, pictures, et al, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/TEAMspinella?hl=en

Friday, June 01, 2012

[TEAMspinella] Congratulations Joey!

We want to enjoy and even celebrate our kids' journeys, no matter where they lead. And yes, they are our kids even though they are others' adults, aren't they?! In that spirit, we would like to invite you to celebrate Joey's graduation from Rice. We were there and have the pictures to prove it!

We were happy to read the following words of commendation he received from one of his mentors:

"Joey is incredibly honest and open - he holds himself to a high moral code, striving for excellence in his faith, his relationships and in his academics - without judging others.. Given the diversity in our student body this is an incredibly rare feat. More importantly, he accomplishes it without ambition or ulterior motive, but rather as a means to know his community en route to better serving his community. An example of his path from knowledge to action can be seen in his creation of Nodgeball, an incredibly successful rec center alternative to NOD. At Brown, he used his place as college president to elevate the respect paid to those that serve the college and to create a sincere, hopeful, enthusiasm for the potential of all Brown students to improve the quality and richness of our community. Brown underclassmen have been very fortunate to have such an excellent role model." Steve C, Master, Brown College, Rice University

As I write, Joey has arrived in Montreal, Canada, where he will be presenting a design project called "FluProof" in an ASME design competition. We wish him the best, though we admit that we, and perhaps he, are a bit distracted by his upcoming wedding to Laura G in Boulder July 28.

Yours back in Colorado, Steve and Laura

PS We've added some new responsibilities recently as part of our work with TEAM in global care, and we have NO international travel planned this summer. We'll write more about that later. And if you know our family, you might be asking, "What about Robby?" Robby has also finished four years at Rice and had a lot of great experiences there. He has returned to Colorado Springs and is entering "life after Rice" here. We are delighted to have him back at home. Sarah remains at Texas A&M in College Station, where she is entering her third year of a Counseling Psychology graduate program.

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>

Friday, April 20, 2012

[TEAMspinella] the music of our lives

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hIqtmjF302Y

Yes, we just passed through Taiwan in a "sandwich trip." In the youtube video above you can see the familiar sites and sounds that made it feel quite a bit less than a strange, new world!

We got to spend time with some of our favorite people, implementing our priority of getting face time (not trash time as in the video!) with people in international ministry. How do we do this?

1) visit people where they are at,

2) invite people to come to us,

3) meet up with people where and when they gather, and

4) use technology and media to supplement (including skype, email, etc)

So (by the numbers!) after some 1, we're on our way to Thailand for some 3, while doing some 2 and 4 along the way.

In Chiang Mai, where we're headed right now, we'll meet with our working team, gathered from around the world, then attend a global conference for people from around the world who share our heart, our assignment, and our priorities ("global member care"). We'll get to top that off next week with some 1 in the heart of Asia before we finish the sandwich with some more face time in Taiwan "on our way" back to the US.

So enjoy that special feeling as you listen to the youtube video, or just close your eyes if that's "just not your world!"

In the one who hears us, wherever and whenever we call, with love, Steve and Laura

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>

Sunday, March 18, 2012

[TEAMspinella] Face time--how much is it worth?

We're in the middle of a three week trip that has includes visits to Hong Kong, a city in the country next to Hong Kong, and Maryland, near Washington DC. We put these trips together because every year for quite a few we have had two events on opposite sides of the world scheduled either the same week or back to back. This year we dealt with that by going straight from one to the other--Friday we woke up in Hong Kong, jumped in a taxi before 8, got on a plane at 11, and flew 16 hours to get off the plane in Chicago. We went through immigration and customs, got on another plane to Washington DC, got picked up and driven through rush hour traffic to Silver Spring, and sat down to a late dinner with some new friends (approximately 24 hours after we left Hong Kong that morning.) Two of our bags caught up with us about 4am the next morning.

Thinking people have asked, "Why do we do this?" By that, I mean more than one, but mainly Laura :-). She asked me that actually somewhere over Vancouver, Canada, I think. The airplanes fly great circle routes, you know, so we also went over Alaska, or at least that's what the map in between the movies on the 747 showed. Shout out to any Canadians! (Well, okay, and Chicagoans.)

With the eerie journey between time zones and jet lag and the drone of four very large jet engines, I'm not sure there is any answer to this question, so basically I punted. Still Laura's question has stuck with me. I can't really write stories about the folks we spend time with on this sort of trip. (We each have the right to tell our own stories, right?) But I thought maybe you might wonder about this too.

We're basically pretty frugal people, so we think about things like this. After all, the Spinella fam's three rules of financial wellness are 1) Shop around, 2) Wait, and 3) Don't buy. To make this trip we just spent more on travel costs than we make in a month. (Math majors: monthly take home pay around $3000; cost for air fare, limited hotels, and visas for this trip close to $4000, after some shopping around.)

My answer to the question is ultimately in the subject line. We don't know for sure which conversations, connections, and shared experiences will be worth the cost, of both our time and our expenses, but we invest both, with hope, in order to get face to face with some valuable and precious people. And yes, we do get sticker shock sometimes (well, a lot) when we see what it all costs. People like us carry a heavy sense of stewardship because we know the dollars we spend come from ministry partners who are making hard choices of their own.

So my takeaways, at least for today:

1) It's okay to question whether it's worth the cost. We do that all the time. I think it's normal.

2) It's okay not only to invest so much ourselves, but to invite others to join us in investing in something that we believe makes a difference.

3) If you want to know how much we're investing or where we're putting the money, it's totally okay to ask us that. anytime. After all, it fits with our three rules of financial wellness.

And did we have some great conversations? Yes, we did, at least so far as we can tell. And we tried to do our part to schedule them, but also waited on the father to bring them about. We did that in Asia, and now we're trusting that to happen here in Maryland. One highlight I can tell you--we participated in a consultation on counseling in the Chinese world, including some presentations I did on family theology and core values (I can send you an old paper if you like that we used, in English or now Chinese.) This included time with people we have known for years, including some we have mentored or coached in ministry. But what's more, it included someone new to us--who is actively working toward becoming the next director of the Center for Counseling and Growth in Taiwan. The challenges for that ministry remain great, but it was great to be able to listen, share, and commit to the father things yet to come.

All the best, from the far side of somewhere, Steve and Laura

PS And we really look forward to the next time we can get face to face with you--even if you're not in Hong Kong or Maryland! We think it's worth a lot.

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>

Monday, March 05, 2012

[TEAMspinella] A triple header

As I write, Laura and I are beginning a trip to Hong Kong, someplace near there, and Maryland, near Washington, DC. This should be both a fun and a challenging trip, not just because of the countries and time zones, but also because it gives us chances to spend time in three worlds we love.

We'll begin by spending time with workers we love who are committed to caring for people from very different worlds. Leaving Taiwan after 14 years was a big transition, but our new role in global care allows us to intentionally seek out international workers and initiate relationships and conversations. We all need encouragement and companions in our journeys. We were having one of these conversations yesterday with coworkers passing through Colorado from Taiwan and one of them said, "If only you could tell the stories. People have no idea what you do." This is definitely tempting, but over time we keep coming back to, "Each of us has the right to tell our own stories!" Or not. Still, in these conversations with coworkers we get to hear pieces, chapters, or choruses from some of the most wonderful and challenging stories, and to walk alongside in the story for a little while. Thank you for the part you play in allowing us to do this.

March 12-16 we'll be at a consultation on Counseling in the Chinese World (CCW). Perhaps you've heard someone say, "Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime." Without knowing much about fishing, I'm guessing everyone who fishes has some things they know, some hunches they follow, and some preferences about how to fish. So probably you don't teach fishing so much as you share stories, hunches, and preferences with each other, whether you're just starting to fish or have been doing it your whole life. That's why we call CCW a consultation! My role this year will be challenging, as I've been asked to lead several sessions looking at core values in marriage and family relationships. At the end of the day, my hope is that we will have shared stories, hunches, and preferences openly, humbly, and respectfully with each other in a way that enriches all of us.

On the other side of the world, as this consultation winds down, a conference will begin in Maryland (3/17-25). In recent years these two events have often been back to back, and as a result we've missed this annual conference. So this year, we're going straight from one to the other! With one stop en route, we plan to fly straight from one to the other, because we love this world too! Like most everyone, we're always balancing at least five commitments: our source community, our sending community, our host community, our team, and our community of care. It's just that in international ministry, these five can diverge a lot more than is comfortable or convenient! To put it another way, by definition we're almost always neglecting one or more of these communities when we focus on another. I see this tension is one of the great stressors for international workers.

So that's our triple-header of a trip March 4-26. Please keep us in your hearts, that we might stay healthy, replenished, and deeply present in these three worlds we love.

If not from the far side, definitely headed there or back again, with love, Steve and Laura

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>

Friday, February 24, 2012

[TEAMspinella] Authenticity is like ogres

Maybe my favorite line from Shrek is when he says that ogres are like onions, they have layers. He goes on to say, of course, that this is not like parfaits. My own struggle and romance with authenticity is somewhat like that. Definitely not a parfait.

One of the first adult small groups I led was based on The Trauma of Transparency. That was a layer. I met with a small group of men in Taiwan for more than 10 years. That was definitely a layer. I went through a year long journey of restoration at the direction of ministry coworkers in TEAM Taiwan. Some more layers.

On the one hand, I am hungry to know others and to be known myself in a deep and intimate way. But on the other hand, there are barriers of fear, wounds of betrayal, and internal guilt and shame that hold me back.

Leadership and self-deception challenges me to recognize that when I am rejecting, judging, blaming, or competing with others, I am often first deceiving myself about who I am and then hedging that lie with attacks about those around me.

The authors of True-Faced, now revised and reissued as The Cure, speak of a choice: Am I trying to please the Father? or Am I asking for grace and mercy? The first of these leads to what they call the room of good intentions, and in that room we show each other what we think is pleasing about ourselves. It is only through the second choice that we enter the room of grace, where we are free to expose our weaknesses, flaws, and even crimes of every sort.

I want to invite you and everyone I meet to join me in this second room. The way I can do that is to trust each and all of you with my struggles, failures, and griefs. I don't do this best by spilling all my junk on you, but by appropriately sharing my real journey and listening respectfully to whatever you are ready to share, not as your judge or even teacher, but as your ally and fellow pilgrim.

Last night I got to do this with a group of grad students in Denver who want to know how to integrate their counseling studies with global needs. In just over a week, we'll be seeking to do this with workers and citizens in Hong Kong and the Chinese world. Thank you for sharing this journey with us.

Looking back from here, I can say that I cherish the journey and the layers. Looking forward, I wonder just how much greater joy and meaningful connections might be yet to come. Of course, looking at what this journey has cost so far, in so many ways, I can only wonder what costs of various kinds might yet need to be paid. I hope I shall be ready to pay them when the time comes!

With love like an ogre, in the one who loves ogres best, Steve and Laura

Steve and Laura Spinella

street: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920

mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
TEAM, PO Box 969, Wheaton, IL 60187, 800 343-3144
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <lauraspinella@alumni.rice.edu>