Specifically, we are told to anticipate that Laura's dad, Bob Ramage, will finish his journey in this world in the next few days. It's been a long journey, including 65 years of marriage, and the anticipation, arrival and now first steps in the past year of OUR first grandbaby in his house. Bob would sit at one end of the table with Evangeline at the other and they would wave!
The journey has not yet ended, but the end is near. This month we moved Bob first to respite care, while Laura and I were on vacation here in Colorado with our three kids, their two spouses, and of course Evangeline. When we returned, with reservations, Martha and Laura concluded Bob should remain in the nearby "cottage" facility through the end of the month.
But as can happen in these situations, what had been a painfully slow progression in dementia and loss of capacity became a frighteningly fast succession of complications and losses this past week. Pray for us as we seek to be alongside Bob and everyone else involved in a time of grief and goodbyes.
As we have matured through the years, I (Steve) have become increasingly aware of how much Bob and Martha have given through the years to empower us to do the ministries and live the lifestyle to which we felt called. Of course this began with the very foolish decision to entrust their daughter into my hands (after "carelessly" allowing young Steve to share many meals, hang around the house, and join the family even in a few holidays and vacations.) When I look back at the young man I was, it's a lot easier to see concerns now they certainly must have had back then :-). I know this was done with a lot of prayer on their part--and likely their friends and family, too.
Other significant moments along the way include when they mobilized to help us move from NJ to CO with two one year olds and a three year old. And then within a year actually moved into our basement, volunteered in the ministry to which we were committed, and filled in the gaps as we parented three pre-schoolers. When they fell in love with a too-big house four miles away the next year and settled permanently, we had little idea how much that would mean to us.
But of course we left them in Colorado and moved to Taiwan just over three years later--after they helped us bury my father and move my mother with ALS to Colorado (stopping over in their house for several weeks). Then we proceeded to base from their home (and usually borrow their cars) every time we returned to the US for the next 15 years.
Small wonder then that in 2010 we moved back to CO, then into a home around the corner, knowing that a journey through dementia appeared to be looming for Bob. By God's grace Bob was able to stay in his home with Martha as his primary caregiver and a growing team of assistance all the way up to the beginning of this month.
So there is much to celebrate and also much to grieve. We are just taking things one step at a time, as we have all along, and seeking to be generous and adaptable as each new day arrives. We are grateful for God's grace in the journey this far, and adjusting our expectations one day, and sometimes one hour, at a time.
For now, Bob is resting peacefully and Laura and Martha are at his side in the Freedom Home on Lexington, which provides a family-style environment of gentle and professional care. Those that can come from far away are mobilizing. We are waiting, praying, and remembering.
With love from this side of eternity, Steve and Laura
Steve and Laura Spinella
US: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920 mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920
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