Saturday, October 21, 2017

[TEAMspinella] Flourishing is an art form

I'm 61 and Laura is a bit younger. We've now been doing "ministry" for the better part of 40 years. Somewhere along the way (maybe halfway through?) I started talking about staying, flourishing, and contributing--in that order. I've said it long enough and often enough it's even possible some day those words might come up at my funeral. (No plans just yet!) It would certainly be ironic if they were put on my gravestone--what exactly would that mean on a gravestone?! I guess I'd be staying anyway :-)

One thing I've revisited repeatedly is the question of why I do what I do (and why you do, too.) I find that motivation for yesterday doesn't quite cut it today. Things keep changing. What looked like flourishing at age 21 might look rather awkward at 41 or 61, and vice versa. So this fall I've been revisiting this once again.

I helped author a leadership development curriculum in my late 30s. At the time, the idea of finishing life well seemed rather remote. Sure I knew I could die anytime, but even my parents had lived to almost 60. Very few of my peers had died and even peak physical fitness seemed like it was still within easy reach if I just made it a priority. Now my co-authors are past retirement, my peers mostly share my graying and broadening, and physical impairment is at every hand. I've outlived my parents and I'm watching up close Laura's parents in their 80s. When discussions come up about trends and paradigm shifts I find myself thinking as much about how there is nothing new under the sun than about how important it is to catch the next wave. In fact, I'm not sure I'll still be around when the next wave passes. I'm fairly sure I won't be asked to lead the charge, like I once dreamed I would be.

Flourishing now means being authentic, compassionate, and calm alongside many younger brothers and sisters as well as a few old salts. It means humbly and patiently contributing alongside each person I can. It means loving and encouraging the weak, the suffering, and the conflicted, and celebrating others as they stay, flourish, and contribute. It also means making room for a few new adventures along the way, worrying less about how to make a difference and more focused on enjoying each day and each relationship as a good gift. And it means not judging myself by what I leave undone, but enjoying with gratitude what I actually do and who I actually am, as a good gift from a God who is not only mighty but also gentle.

Since I wrote you last, I had a great trip to Spain and Switzerland, where I got to participate in many good conversations and come alongside some great fellow pilgrims. A highlight was visiting my sister and her husband who have been staying...in Spain for many years. The elder in charge of their fellowship invited me to share in the weekly worship. It occurred to me that I could share stories about my sister that they would otherwise never hear. What fun! Laura and I also went together to a conference on "pastoral training for membercare."

So here's the pitch (and the prayer request): Our challenge is to flourish in exactly the situation we are in today, with all of its complications, unfinished challenges, distractions, frustrations, pains, and disappointments, as well as the opportunities, adventures, relationships, and joys.

In the One who keeps us,

Steve and Laura

PS If you are a man in international ministry or you know one, tell him about http://catalystintl.org/traction/. I very much enjoyed this blend of time with God, with other men, and in community. It provided the context from some really good conversations! And here is a link to pictures of a crazy adventure I participated in over against the advice of my saner side. Klettersteig Murren

Steve and Laura Spinella
US: 1930 Springcrest Rd, CO Springs 80920
mail: 9685 Otero Ave, Colorado Springs, CO 80920
Steve cell 719.355.4809, Laura cell 832.755.4261
<spinella@alumni.rice.edu> <
​lauraspinella@​g​mail.com
>

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